Led Zeppelin crashed on Top Gear

Well fancy that – Led Zeppelin played a loud and boring role on Top Gear three decades before Jeremy Clarkson made political incorrectness de rigueur on the programme.  Apparently according to news leaked by the BBC today, legendary rockers-to-be Led Zeppelin were somewhat dull and unconvincing – and the pretentious BBC radio hacks would rather listen to Muddy Waters if they wanted some bluesy riffs back in 1969.

I am exaggerating slightly of course – as Top Gear’s first incarnation was a cult radio show of the much-admired John Peal – rather than a lad’s showcase loosely built around fuel-powered penis extensions.  But for some reason, the reaction of ill-qualified BBC producers from 40 years ago hit the news this week.

The fact that Led Zeppelin’s early bluesy stuff got a rather sniffy reaction for the worties at the BBC is supposed to be a bit of a shock.  But those of us who have heard the session know the BBC hacks got their critique of soon-to-be classics as Dazed & Confused and Communication Breakdown spot on.

Also it is difficult to disagree with the BBC audition panel’s less than enthusiastic reception of David Bowie in 1965.  “ A singer devoid of personality”, apparently.

I’m also quite taken with the panel’s perceptive view of T Rex. “Crap – and pretentious crap at that”.  Spot on.

Top Gear was presumably cutting edge stuff in 1969.  Radio 1 was set up as recently as 1967 to combat the rise of pirate radio stations, which had lured millions of listeners hungry for more modern music.  The BBC was obviously determined to be right on and groovy.  But as the audition reports show, they were still determined to uphold more traditional standards.

DJ Bob Harris, who joined Radio 1 in 1970 said: “In 1969 there was still a somewhat resentful attitude among some at the BBC that Radio 1 had been foisted upon them. Some of the old guard looked down their noses at rock.”

Peel eventually broadcast over 4,000 sessions by more than 2,000 artists, giving early exposure to bands such as The Smiths and The White Stripes.  Meanwhile Radio 1 is so cutting edge, right on and groovy in 2009 that it wants you to start your day with the unfunny and talentless Chris Moyles.   Some people never learn.

Pick up a bargain

Today’s Times has the fascinating news that Jensen Button has put his Bugatti Veyron on the market – a snip at £900,000 with one not-so careful owner.

I hope he does better than me the last time I put a car in Autotrader. I got a lot of telephone calls from people selling advertising space in other magazines – and time wasters who never showed up.

I’m undecided about the Veyron. I like it and Jeremy Clarkson speaks very highly about it on Top Gear. But I am a bit worried about the £25,000 annual service bills – and the fact that I haven’t got £900 – let alone £900,000.

According to a helpful article on buying Supercars in the Sunday Times last weekend, the Veyron is not a particularly good buy. It’s too big to use on British roads – and it depreciates almost as fast as it travels.

So I can only assume Jensen Button reads the Sunday Times when he is not driving around in circles. Their recommendation was for another million pound motor – the Enzo Ferrari.

And I see Mr Button is keeping his one of those too for the time being. Button must have quite a big garage in Monte Carlo because he apparently has a Mercedes AMG and an Audi RS6 Avant too.

Well I suppose his girlfriend needs a car to get to the shops – and the Audi is dead useful when you want to take your dog for a ride at 180mph All of which brings me back to the car I tried to sell in Autotrader.

I still have it sitting forlornly in the back of my garden. It used to be a bit of a liability – but now it is apparently worth £2000! The only snag is that I will have to exchange it for a new car… something I don’t want to do as I have never bought a new car in my life.

I’m not much of a one for green mania – and I cannot see the logic in swapping a car that does not go – and is therefore not polluting the environment one iota – for one that does go.

Even if you believe the baloney that marginally improved fuel efficiency is somehow important – there is the small matter of making the car that nobody currently wants to buy. Wouldn’t it be just a tad more ecologically friendly not to build all those cars in the first place?